Etiquette Answers - Cash Bar Yes or No?

I know that the way the economy is going, wedding budgets are tighter and couples are trying to save money. Recently, I was asked if having a cash bar at your wedding is ever acceptable. The easiest answer is that this largely depends on the expectations of your friends and family, your cultural traditions and the formality of the occasion.

In a perfect world we would all be able to foot the bill for an evening of spirits. However, with more couples being budget conscious, this isn't always possible. That said, couples should strive to host a bar for their guests.

There are several ways to have alcohol available without breaking the bank. My favorite suggestion is to provide beer and wine for a limited amount of time, or until supplies are gone. This way guests have been provided a beverage even if it isn't for the entire evening. Then, if they still want another glass they can buy one at the cash bar.

Another suggestion is to do a signature cocktail. By only providing one type of cocktail to your guests, you can set the price point and get a good estimate from your venue. Also, you can set limits on this aspect by providing drink tickets to your guests. (Bonus, you can create tickets that incorporate your event design.)

Finally, the other option is to host a champagne toast only. Each table gets a bottle of champagne which is poured during toasts to the newlyweds. This is the most cost effective way to provide some spirits at your wedding.

Of course, doing any of these suggestions in conjunction with an available cash bar is the happy medium. I do want to reiterate that, if you are having a white or black-tie wedding, then it really isn't acceptable to have a cash bar at such a formal event.The expectation with very formal weddings is that the bar will be completely hosted.

Furthermore, if you know having a cash bar is not an accepted tradition within your culture or your family will give you a hard time, then you should avoid it. Cut back in other areas of your budget so you can afford to host the bar.

You can save money by not doing favors, or using store-bought invitations and embellishing them. The fastest way to be able to host the bar would be to trim your guest count. This means co-workers, friends of your parents and distant relatives are not invited.

The topic of hosted bars and cash bars are tricky for couples. Yet, I'm confident that if you look at the top three factors of family, cultural traditions and formality you will be able to make a decision that suits both your budget and your guests.

In short, during these economic times it is not appropriate to rule out a cash bar unless you are hosting a very formal event. However, it is very desirable for the hosts to avoid a cash bar if they are able.

Happy Planning!